Mental Health Awareness Month in New Jersey: What Teens and Parents Actually Need to Hear
By Denise Takakjy, PhD, LPC-NJ | Healing Hearts Healthy Minds
May is Mental Health Awareness Month and every year, I watch it come and go with a flood of pastel graphics and well-meaning posts that don't quite land for the people who need them most: teenagers who are genuinely struggling, and the parents who love them and have no idea what to do. So this year, let’s get down to the facts.
Here's what I actually want you to know.
To the Teen Reading This
First — hi. I'm glad you're here. I was a struggling teen once too. My emotions used to overwhelm me in ways I couldn't explain, and I didn't always have the words for what I was feeling. I know what it's like to look completely fine on the outside while falling apart on the inside.
What you're feeling is real. And it's not too much.
May in New Jersey can feel like a pressure cooker: AP exams, prom, graduation, college decisions, the end of a school year that either went great or really didn't. For a lot of teens & young adults, this is one of the hardest times of the year, not one of the easiest.
Remember…
You don't have to earn the right to struggle. You don't need a "good enough" reason to feel anxious, depressed, or overwhelmed. Your feelings don't need to be justified to a list of criteria before they count.
Asking for help isn't weak. I know that sounds like a poster on a school wall. But I mean it differently — asking for help actually takes more self-awareness than most adults have. It's a skill, not a sign that something is wrong with you.
Therapy doesn't mean something is broken. It means you're taking your mental health as seriously as you'd take a broken bone. It's just that the injury is invisible to everyone else.
If you've been self-harming, having thoughts of suicide, or feeling like you're just going through the motions of life, please tell someone such as a parent, a trusted school counselor, or a therapist. If you're not ready to talk to someone you know, you can always reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.
To the Parent Reading This
I also became a therapist because of a parent; my mom. She was by my side through everything, but I watched her feel helpless, not knowing what to do or how to reach me. If that's you right now, I want you to know: your helplessness doesn't mean you're failing. It means you're in an incredibly hard situation that no one prepares you for. Here's what I see in my practice every day that I wish more parents knew:
Your teen isn't giving you attitude, they're giving you information. Withdrawal, irritability, and shutting down are often how teens communicate distress when they don't have the words. It's not personal, even when it feels that way.
Pushing harder rarely opens the door. When teens feel cornered or lectured, they shut down further. Connection comes before correction, every time.
"Have you tried just being happy?" doesn't help. Neither does "You have so much to be grateful for." These responses — even when said with love — tell your teen that their feelings are wrong, and they'll stop sharing them with you.
What actually helps:
Sitting with them without an agenda
Saying "I'm not here to fix it, I just want to understand"
Asking "What do you need from me right now?"
Getting support for yourself so you can show up for them
And if your teen has been hospitalized, is self-harming, or you feel like you're out of options, please don't wait. There is support specifically designed for families in this situation, and you don't have to navigate it alone.
Mental Health in New Jersey: What's Available
New Jersey has some strong mental health resources, but navigating them can feel overwhelming. Here's a quick breakdown:
NJ MentalHealthCares Helpline: 1-866-202-HELP (4357) — connects NJ residents to local mental health services
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988, available 24/7
NJ Division of Mental Health & Addiction Services: Offers county-based programs and crisis services statewide
Virtual therapy (like what we offer at Healing Hearts Healthy Minds): Available across all of New Jersey, no commute required — which matters when your teen already doesn't want to leave the house
If you're in need of a virtual therapist in New Jersey who specializes in teens and young adults, I'd encourage you to look for someone who uses evidence-based approaches like DBT or EMDR, and who actively includes parents in the process. Those two things make a real difference in outcomes.
Mental Health Awareness Month isn't just about awareness. Awareness without action doesn't change much. You can always schedule a free 15-minute consultation with me at Healing Hearts Healthy Minds. No pressure, no commitment — just a conversation. Healing is possible. I've seen it. And I've lived it.
Denise Takakjy, PhD, LPC-NJ, is a licensed therapist and founder of Healing Hearts Healthy Minds Counseling Services PLLC. She specializes in teen and young adult mental health, trauma, and DBT — working virtually with clients in New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, and Connecticut.